I've just been out for a walk. I started off at my normal fairly fast pace, but found myself flagging after a bit - my ankle began to hurt. So, naturally, I speeded up. I got to the turn-around point and noted there was no way I'd make it back for 4:30pm (the watch I was using says 36 past, and I got some fruit and a drink when I came in, but I didn't *quite* make 4:30). So what did I do? I went *even* faster. And after insisting I kept up this pace for ages, and feeling very dead-on-my-feet from a nasty stitch, what did I do? Yup, I started running. and I *never* run. And I ran halfway down the road and up my quite steep drive and into the house, and almost fell over getting stuff, and feel really boiling hot and sweaty, and my legs will ache like anything in the morning - but I feel rather happy, because although getting so tired out from such a short work shows I'm still terribly physically unfit, I kinda feel that being able to keep going shows I'm not entirely unfit as a person. I thought as I was going at some point 'Hmm, pain. Right, that's called motivation. Why am I deliberately going faster and making things hurt more? Because it shows I'm human (vague references from Dune here). In what way is that good or 'showing you're human'? Because only humans can come up with such silly motivations as 'Because I'm human', animals don't have that luxury'. So, why was I so resistant to going for a walk earlier? Ahwell, twas better this way, 'cos I had the motivation to get back quickly. I *am* terribly hot and sticky tho.
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