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My mood is currently Depressed (as of the time I wrote this, anyway - I've calmed down a fair amount now). Look at the little mood icon. Watch it cry. Then read on.
The actual interviewy stuff itself went pretty much perfectly. The subject interview problems were pathetically easy. I don't know how the admissions tutor one went; it depends what he feels about being caught totally flat-footed, twice. The first time it was because I have CCHS and Braintree College down, and he couldn't work out what order I'd attended them in or basically what was going on there. The second, because they screwed up the information at the open day.
I. Have. To. Take. STEP. And that's II and III I mean. And y'know what: if I was only taking Single Maths, I'd only have to do STEP I. (Absolutely *no* laughing at the back there, Naath.) I want to kill something. Preferably something concerning the admissions staff at Churchill.
Apparently this is the second year they're asking for STEP, because the first year they asked for it turned out so well. So the second set of people that must die are the ones who didn't deliberately mess up their exam results as protest against being asked for STEP grades.
I also keep wanting to loudly proclaim various not-particularly-inventive curses involving, for instance, broom handles. (Presumably of the roughly-hewn variety.) But I don't think that would be particularly productive.
The worst bit is, I don't even know if I really want to do their course any more... I'm beginning to detest certain areas of Mathmatics with a passion, and I'm not particularly enamoured of the idea of spending yet another year fighting with them. (Of course, most compsci courses are going to have *some*, but I think I can put up with *some*, or at least I'm going to have to.) But I want the *other* things at Cambridge, like lots of highly intelligent people and Poohsoc and CURS and CICCU... and it's, like, a place I know. So it isn't as scary. But the maths is scary.
And because I don't even know if I *got* an offer until January (because the very best thing that could happen to me at this point is that I get rejected by them, so that I don't have to make any decisions, I don't feel that I could always have worked harder and driven myself further into the ground and got there and life would have been all wonderful from there on in, I can just shrug and say 'luck of the draw' and stop *worrying*. People quoting Bible verses at me about not worrying are in danger of being shot, or at least yelled at in a most incoherant fashion. I *know* all of that. It doesn't help right now.)
Having said that, I do need to do something about all this stressing before I explode. (It doesn't help that I feel increadibly selfish for whining, given that the most positive thing I do is apparently be there for people, which whining at them and expecting them to rally round kind of negates, really.)
The actual interviewy stuff itself went pretty much perfectly. The subject interview problems were pathetically easy. I don't know how the admissions tutor one went; it depends what he feels about being caught totally flat-footed, twice. The first time it was because I have CCHS and Braintree College down, and he couldn't work out what order I'd attended them in or basically what was going on there. The second, because they screwed up the information at the open day.
I. Have. To. Take. STEP. And that's II and III I mean. And y'know what: if I was only taking Single Maths, I'd only have to do STEP I. (Absolutely *no* laughing at the back there, Naath.) I want to kill something. Preferably something concerning the admissions staff at Churchill.
Apparently this is the second year they're asking for STEP, because the first year they asked for it turned out so well. So the second set of people that must die are the ones who didn't deliberately mess up their exam results as protest against being asked for STEP grades.
I also keep wanting to loudly proclaim various not-particularly-inventive curses involving, for instance, broom handles. (Presumably of the roughly-hewn variety.) But I don't think that would be particularly productive.
The worst bit is, I don't even know if I really want to do their course any more... I'm beginning to detest certain areas of Mathmatics with a passion, and I'm not particularly enamoured of the idea of spending yet another year fighting with them. (Of course, most compsci courses are going to have *some*, but I think I can put up with *some*, or at least I'm going to have to.) But I want the *other* things at Cambridge, like lots of highly intelligent people and Poohsoc and CURS and CICCU... and it's, like, a place I know. So it isn't as scary. But the maths is scary.
And because I don't even know if I *got* an offer until January (because the very best thing that could happen to me at this point is that I get rejected by them, so that I don't have to make any decisions, I don't feel that I could always have worked harder and driven myself further into the ground and got there and life would have been all wonderful from there on in, I can just shrug and say 'luck of the draw' and stop *worrying*. People quoting Bible verses at me about not worrying are in danger of being shot, or at least yelled at in a most incoherant fashion. I *know* all of that. It doesn't help right now.)
Having said that, I do need to do something about all this stressing before I explode. (It doesn't help that I feel increadibly selfish for whining, given that the most positive thing I do is apparently be there for people, which whining at them and expecting them to rally round kind of negates, really.)
no subject
Date: 2002-12-03 05:06 pm (UTC)From:For starters, a rejection would not be the best thing that could happen to you. Making decissions, especially about important things, can be really tough sometimes, but it is one of the things that make us human and it isn't something we should shy away from. And at the end of the day, you have the knowledge and ability to make decissions as to what is best for you a whole lot better than anyone else does.
With that in mind, if you don't want to go to Cambridge then don't go to Cambridge. There is nothing wrong with getting an offer and then not going, and anyone who would think less of you for that is, well, a bit silly really.
Yes, Cambridge is an absolutely gorgeous city, and there are lots of cool people there, and the extracuricular side to the university is ace, but this is also true of some other universities. I don't know where else you've applied, so I can't comment on specifics, but I'd bet that they all have ome good stuff to offer in tht regard.
And while all the extra-curicular stuff should be an influencing factor in deciding what university you should go to, so should the course. And I say that as someone who has dropped out of two universities courses that really weren't even vaguely suitable for her. Doing a course that you're not going to enjoy is a Bad Thing, especially with maths. And I don't know the details, but I'd be fairly confident in saying that the maths in a CU compsci course is going to be hard. And again, I speak from experience when I say that doing a course with difficult maths that you aren't enjoying sucks quite exceptionally.
Which brings me onto STEP. If you have a teacher to help you thrpugh it, as Naath suggested, then STEP really shouldn't be too much of a problem; at least in terms of doing well enough at it to get in. Yes, I know that it's an extra workload at a time where you really don't want that workload, which sucks, but other than that it should be OK. Think of it as a taster of what's to come. If you're finding it horrendously difficult and hating every minute of it, then it's worth considering that maybe Cambridge isn't for you.
And reading all of what I've just written back through, I realise that I've come across as a whole lot more negative than I intended to. The problem as I see it, is that there's a whole lot of pro-Oxbridge sentiment around, and people are encouraged to apply for Oxbridge if they can, and, in my case at least, there wasn't a balancing voice. I was a straight A student, I wanted to do physics, therefore I applied to Oxford. It was that simple, and it shouldn't have been, and with hindsight I think I'd have been better off going to Lancaster or Durham or somewhere.
I'm not trying to say that you shouldn't go to Cambridge. Far from it. I utterly love both Oxford and Cambridge. They're both gorgeous cities, they both have high quality courses, and great extracuricular activities. They just aren't suited to everyone. And if you are having doubts about the course, then please, sit down and think about it. If you decide that Cambridge is right, then that's great. If you decide that you'd rather be somewhere else then there's no shame in that either.
And whatever does happen in the end, I hope that everything turns out well for you.