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Went for a walk today. It was a lovely sunny day, maybe a little too hot. I crossed the train tracks and noticed about halfway across that I could actually see an oncoming train in the distance; I knew that I could obviously get across in time, and did so, and was not afraid in my head at all, but my heart started beating a lot faster. I think it's funny how your body is sometimes frightened when your mind isn't. I saw a rabbit about a metre away, too, and robins (what is this myth that they only have red breasts in winter anyway? these were normal red-brested robins, or I wouldn't have been able to identify them). It was all very bright and colourful and I noticed at several points that I really should have been quite happy - I mean, I felt the happiness beneath the surface, but it's Gray Cloud Week this week so I couldn't actually feel happy, or anything much in fact.
Also, I felt useless for having spent most of the day spodding around Rondak's Portal, trying to make an ECL 15 character I didn't really care about anyway, and not having washed my hair or the dishes in time.
Then someone from Wyvern Buisiness Systems phoned and said that they thought the problem was that my speakers were muted and they fixed it; my speakers were only muted because I'd been playing Torment late at night and didn't want my parents to be woken up by it, and that would hardly affect it under Linux. I was confused and didn't work that out until after I'd put the phone down (having just fielded coming home from a walk and my mother) and so had to ring them back and sound like a complete moron. Then I got to look even more moronic because their set of external speakers worked fine. So all this sending Moondaughter away business has been useless because they haven't actually found anything to fix; I've just acquired myself a reputation as a moron at WBS.
I still need to wash my hair but am suffering from chronic tuit-shortage. Also I need to sort my life out, but this week is a spectacularly bad time to do so, because my current default status is 'berate self for being useless and believe best solution is to be dead', which is an unremittingly stupid position and hence shouldn't be dwelt on.
I tried to count my steps between the two '1060 yards of no footpath' signs to see if a yard was a step but I missed a number at about 77 and then my brain just gave up trying to catch up by about 85.
On the drive home, a hoverfly died attaching itself to my windscreen. Also, I saw a black and yellow sports car.
Also, I felt useless for having spent most of the day spodding around Rondak's Portal, trying to make an ECL 15 character I didn't really care about anyway, and not having washed my hair or the dishes in time.
Then someone from Wyvern Buisiness Systems phoned and said that they thought the problem was that my speakers were muted and they fixed it; my speakers were only muted because I'd been playing Torment late at night and didn't want my parents to be woken up by it, and that would hardly affect it under Linux. I was confused and didn't work that out until after I'd put the phone down (having just fielded coming home from a walk and my mother) and so had to ring them back and sound like a complete moron. Then I got to look even more moronic because their set of external speakers worked fine. So all this sending Moondaughter away business has been useless because they haven't actually found anything to fix; I've just acquired myself a reputation as a moron at WBS.
I still need to wash my hair but am suffering from chronic tuit-shortage. Also I need to sort my life out, but this week is a spectacularly bad time to do so, because my current default status is 'berate self for being useless and believe best solution is to be dead', which is an unremittingly stupid position and hence shouldn't be dwelt on.
I tried to count my steps between the two '1060 yards of no footpath' signs to see if a yard was a step but I missed a number at about 77 and then my brain just gave up trying to catch up by about 85.
On the drive home, a hoverfly died attaching itself to my windscreen. Also, I saw a black and yellow sports car.
