(no subject)

[chess]

1. What was the last meaningful thing you did? Everything I do is meaningful, as in it has a meaning. The meaning of pretty much all of what I've done so far today is 'I'm lazy and I don't want to face life or the world today'.
2. What was your first love like? I have never actually loved another human being in a romantic sense, as far as I can tell. (Lusted after, yes; liked, certainly. Loved, no.)
3. What do you wish you could tell your parents? I already told them everything I want to. I only have 'I wish I could tell you x' moments with them when I'm being randomdepressed about things that are actually not an issue.
4. What is the one thing you would never do, no matter how much you wanted to? There are things that I'd like to think I wouldn't do, but they're the normal kind of stuff you'd expect reasonably moral people to not want to think they'd do. There are circumstances for just about everything, though. And I can't guarantee I won't change.
5. What are your favorite sounds? Music. *Which* music varies. Singing, specifically.
6. How do you get over someone? I grow, and they grow, and we change, and the person I wanted isn't the person that's there any more, and I am no longer the person who wanted them, and that's how it ends.
7. Do you like cartoons? I like to watch cartoons when I'm ill. Otherwise, I'm generally too impatient to watch the TV.
8. Have you ever contemplated suicide? I've never actually seriously *considered* suicide (to the point of preparing to attempt it, i.e. more than a wistful 'I wish something would come along and kill me so I could be dead and not have to face $SITUATION and be in heaven and stuff'), but I've certainly mused about what the best way to do it would be, and so forth.
9. How old were you when you gave/received your first kiss? I keep forgetting which birthday I know that it was less than a year before... was that my 15th or my 16th birthday? Probably 15th.
10. How do you deal with anger? My voice goes all squeaky. Then I cry. Often I jump up and down on the spot a bit, too. I'm not sure whether that's really anger or just frustration, though. Anger/fear tends to lead to me hitting out at whatever's causing the fear, if there's a suitible target.
11. What is your opinion on bisexuality? This is a question I am leaving well alone.
12. In a perfect world, what would you be? Myself.
13. How tall are you? Once upon a time, i.e. the last time I actually measured myself and took notice of the measurements, I was five foot three inches. Opinions vary as to whether I've grown or shrunk since then.
14. Do you ever feel invisible? I often feel inaudible, but not generally invisible unless I techincally am.
15. Would you be willing to go on Temptation Island? I don't have a long-term relationship, so how could I?
16. Do you keep a journal? Uhm... *points at screen*
17. What is the most unusual gift you bought for somebody last Christmas? I think I bought the grand total of one gift, which I don't even know if it ever got to the person I bought it for. It wasn't particularly unusual.
18. Why do you fail? Because I'm human.
19. Do you write snail mail to anyone or do you mostly email? I only send snail mail to institutions that demand it (i.e. sending back forms and so forth).
20. How do you feel about pornography? The main problem with it is when the people involved are being exploited against their will (and this includes 'for money they desperately need' as well as 'under actual physical or emotional duress').
21. What is heaven like? Better than what I can describe.
22. What do you have on your walls? Posters of pretty things. An ancient cork noticeboard that's stained blackish from being above my monitor. A lightswitch.
23. What is hell like? Bad.
24. What is the most embarrassing CD in your collection? I don't have a CD collection. I do, however, own a Shakespear's Sisters music video, which is pretty embarrassing.
25. What is in your fridge right now? Food.
26.What is your date and place of birth? 7 June 1985, Braintree.
27. If you could talk to yourself as a five year old for five seconds, what would you say? I wouldn't want to. I have nothing to say. (Really. I wouldn't change anything in my life so far. I can't think of anything to change it to that would make it better. Even the bad stuff seems to have had a purpose. There are things I could change, sure, but I don't think they would have made anything better.)
28. If Satan appeared to you right now, what would he say? "You're a useless, lazy good-for-nothing kid. Nobody will ever love you, you're not capable of love yourself; and you can't even do anything useful. Look at all the good things you've been given, look at them, and this is what you're wasting your life on? You don't deserve any of it, you ungrateful wretch, you ought to be happy with all this, stop whining." Mm. I could go on a long time with that.
29. What should people pay more attention to? God.
30. Left handed or right? Right. Although if it's something involving strength, like batting at rounders, I used to be better with my left hand for that. I'm not sure whether that's the case any more, having not done anything like that for ages.
31. What about you would surprise other people? It depends entirely on which people, and I don't really know what would surprise who.
32. What is your favorite poem? Probably 'Not Waving But Drowning'.
33. What is a guilty pleasure you have? I don't think I have any (that I actually indulge, at any rate).
34. What book changed your life? The Bible.
35. What's in your shower? We don't have a self-contained shower; it's just an attachment to the bath. So, shower gel on the side of the bath and soap at the end.

Comments

[rho]

What's wrong with Shakespear's Sister? They had some realy good songs.

[passage.livejournal.com]

The present did arrive, and is kinda remarkable, or at least strange. He's been on an intresting adventure: Poohsoc decided he belonged to Rachel and she took him to support Cambridge in the Varsity Water Polo, where his presence pushed Cambridge on to an enourmous victory (I think we lost last year, so the critical change was evidently Snowpooh's presence). He also had fun exploring Rachel's room before I took him back the next day.

However, Poohsoc thinks he looks like a womble, which has been troubling him.

Neil

P.S.: I don't believe your answer to Q12, or at least, I don't believe you would be you as you are now, but instead you transfomred.

[chess]

I meant that I'd be able to be myself (whoever that might be in a perfect world) instead of having to pretend to be otherwise for varying reasons.

[chess]

They're not my dad's taste in music, which is what I normally go with (as he has a massive CD collection), so I view them as potentially bad (because I *know* I have insanely bad taste in music when I'm let loose).